Blind Date
Yo Dawg, I heard you like blind dates so I set you up on a blind date with a blind date so you can date a date while you blind date! - Matty Malaprop
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Employer calls employee's emergency contact to ask if he can come into work: 'Employer just called my mom to ask if I'd come in, because I didn't answer. I'm 30 years old.'
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Homeowner lets her parents, brother, brother's girlfriend, and nephew live in her basement, parents demand she let her brother's family move upstairs: 'I work from home as a therapist and see clients upstairs.'
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Boss denies raise to $15/hr worker, immediately starts criticizing them when they ask: 'They forced you out. They were calling your bluff'
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